A. Anaheim Ducks
. Ducks haven't been this excited since Charlie Conway led the Mighty Ducks
past the Hawks in the aptly-named 1992 film "The Mighty Ducks." These Ducks
finally ended their Game 7 woes, halting a streak of five such losses by
beating Edmonton 2-1 last Wednesday. However, Anaheim currently trails
Nashville 2-1 in the Western Conference Finals.
B. Bobby Valentine
. David Ortiz goes absolutely all in on Valentine in the slugger's upcoming
book. Excerpts reveal that Ortiz calls his manager "clueless," "distant,"
"in his own bubble," and says simply that "he didn't treat people well."
Valentine fired back: "Obviously, David didn't even understand what was
going on…. I hope he sells a lot of books." Now this is a lot more
entertaining than the Red Sox have been this season.
C. Chelsea
. There was no Leicester City-esque Cinderella story in the 2016-17 English
Premier League. Perennial powerhouse Chelsea rolled to the title, clinching
it-with three matches still remaining-thanks to a 1-0 victory over West
Bromwich last Friday night.
D.Derek Jeter
. Jeter had his No. 2 jersey retired by the Yankees this past Sunday. As
good as his baseball career was, he has been even better in retirement
(see: Davis, Hannah).
New York (Pineda) is a -120 road favorite
over Kansas City (Vargas) on Wednesday, per MyBookie.ag.
E. Eugenie Bouchard
. If you pay attention to women's tennis, you know it's one of the greatest
reality shows in sports right now with Maria Sharapova's controversial
comeback in progress. Bouchard recently called Sharapova, who had been
suspended 15 months for performance-enhancing drugs, a "cheater" and that
reinstating her to tennis was "so unfair." The Canadian promptly beat
Sharapova in three sets last week in Madrid. Bouchard is +4000 at
BetOnline Sportsbook
to win the French Open.
F. Familia, Jeurys
. What else can go wrong for the Mets right now? Noah Syndergaard is out
with a biceps injury, Matt Harvey is depressed because Adriana Lima has
been hanging out with Julian Edelman, and now Familia may miss the rest of
the season due to a blood clot in his shoulder. Moreover, Washington is
playing so well that New York already trails in the National League East by
a whopping nine games.
G. Gordon, Josh
. Death, taxes, and Josh Gordon being suspended…. The Browns' much-maligned
wide receiver, who has been banned from 43 of his team's last 48 games and
has not played since December of 2014, had his application for
reinstatement denied by the NFL last week. In the words of Stephen A.
Smith, "stay off the weeeeeeeed."
GT Bets
has Cleveland as a +8 home underdog against Pittsburgh in Week 1.
H. Happ, Ian
. The Cubs' 22-year-old outfielder has played in three career games (all
since last Saturday) and has reached base seven times-including four hits
and two home runs. At least something is going right this season for the
defending champions.
I.
Isaiah Thomas
. Boston's star point guard struggled from Game 3 through Game 6 against
Washington, but he came up big in the decider on Monday. Thomas delivered
29 points, went 3-for-5 from the long range, and dished out 12 assists in a
115-105 victory. Of course, the Wizards will be having even more extreme
nightmares about Kelly Olynyk.
The Celtics are +4.5 road underdogs
against Cleveland in Game 1 on Wednesday, as indicated by Bovada
Sportsbook.
J. James Harden
. Whereas Thomas briefly disappeared in the middle of the Celtics'
conference semifinal series, Harden evaporated when it mattered most. In a
humiliating, season-ending 114-75 home loss to San Antonio in Game 6,
Harden shot 2-for-11 and scored a mere 10 points before fouling out. Oh
well, nothing a little partying at the strip club and hanging out with
Kylie Jenner can't solve!
K. Kim, Si Woo
. Woo hoo! Kim put much bigger names to shame at The Players Championship
last week. The 21-year-old South Korean became the youngest winner of the
event when he triumphed by three shots over Louis Oosthuizen and Ian
Poulter. Despite being $1.9 million richer, Kim celebrated by sitting in a
middle seat in coach on a flight to Atlanta.
L. LaVar Ball
. Your weekly LaVar Ball update: according to him (and He would probably
appreciate it being capitalized "Him"), Michael Jordan couldn't sell $495
shoes because "He's not Lonzo Ball." The elder Ball better hope Lonzo and
M.J. don't have one other thing in common: the third pick in the NBA Draft.
If that's the case, Lonzo will not be a Laker, but instead a…gasp…76er.
M. Martin, Kaden
. Leave it to Lane Kiffin to make controversial news in the offseason.
Florida Atlantic's head coach made a verbal scholarship offer to the
13-year-old Martin on Monday. Martin is the son of former Tennessee
quarterback Tee Martin. Perhaps the funniest part of the whole thing is the
idea that Kiffin might actually still be at Florida Atlantic in six years.
N. Nadal, Rafael
. As if the King of Clay needed any help right now, recent nemesis Roger
Federer withdrew from the upcoming French Open on Monday. Nadal is 15-0 on
the red stuff this season and captured his third straight title last week
in Madrid. Who can stop him in Paris now that Federer is out?
O. Ovechkin, Alex
. Apparently the Capitals have taken notes from cities like Buffalo and
Atlanta and have thus decided to minimize heartbreak by not even advancing
to the final round. After getting bounced out of the playoffs in seven
games by Pittsburgh last week, Washington has now reached the postseason
nine out of the past 10 years and still has never made it to the conference
finals.It stinks for Ovechkin, but no sports heartbreak will outweigh the
fact that he once broke up with tennis starlet Maria Kirilenko.
The Penguins are -124 road favorites
over Ottawa in Game 3 on Wednesday, according to BetOnline Sportsbook.
P. Preakness Stakes
.The second leg of horse racing's Triple Crown takes place this weekend in
Maryland. Kentucky Derby champion Always Dreaming is a -140 favorite at MyBookie.ag to win
the Preakness.
Q. Quentin Sims
. If you have Sims on your Arena Football League fantasy team, you are
doing work. Then again, if you actually have time to play Arena League
fantasy, you've probably never worked a day in your life. Whatever the
case, Sims-of the Cleveland Gladiators-leads the AFL in receiving yards per
game (121.8) and is second in total touchdowns (12). He is also sixth in
the entire league with six rushing attempts and seventh with a grand total
of 16 rushing yards!
R. Robert Griffin III
. RG3 recently announced on Instagram that he is engaged to former Florida
State track star Grete Sadeiko and that they are expecting a child.
Sadeiko, who graduated from FSU this spring, started dating the quarterback
last August. That was fast.
S. Sergio Garcia
. Garcia did not follow up his Masters victory by winning The Players
Championship. But he did do something even more rare than winning The
Players. He became the eighth player in tournament history to ace the
famous island hole when he fired a hole in one at the 17th last
Thursday. When things are going well, they're really going well. Sergio is
+1220 at BookMaker to
win this week's AT&T Byron Nelson.
T.
Truex Jr., Martin
. A fiery crash involving Aric Almirola, Danica Patrick, and Joey Logano
was the big story at Kansas Speedway last Saturday night (Almirola suffered
a back injury that may sideline him for the foreseeable future). But it was
Truex who took home the checkered flag after holding
off the rest of the field following two late restarts.
U. UEFA Champions League
. It will be Real Madrid vs. Juventus for the Champions League title. In a
rematch of last year's final, which Real won in penalty kicks, Cristiano
Ronaldo and company again got the best of Atletico Madrid-this time 4-2 on
aggregate. Juventus won the other semifinalby an aggregate score of 4-1
over Monaco.
Bovada Sportsbook
has Real as a -125 favorite.
V. Vasectomy
. Not even a vasectomy has been able to stop former Jets' cornerback and
legendary kid-producerAntonio Cromartie. It was announced earlier this week
that Cromartie and his wife are expecting their 14th
child-including their third since he got a vasectomy in 2011.
W.Weigh-in
. Normally weigh-ins are reserved for fighters, but Eddie Lacy got on the
scale earlier this week and was rewarded handsomely for his efforts. The
Seahawks' running back earned a $55,000 bonus for being under 255 pounds
(he was 253). Don't get any ideas with your kicker, Penn State!
X. Xander Bogaerts
. After going deep 21 times in 2016, Bogaerts has not yet homered this
year. But the Red Sox may take it, because their shortstop is batting .336
and has stolen six bases. 5Dimes Sportsbook has
Boston (Porcello) as a -101 underdog at St. Louis (Leake) on Wednesday.
Y. Yasmani Grandal
. How do you single-handedly end one of your players' hitting streaks?
Bench him and then pinch hit him for one at-bat late in the game, of
course. That's what happened on Tuesday to Grandal, who had hit safely in
nine straight contests before going 0-for-1 in the Dodgers' 2-1 loss at San
Francisco. Thanks a lot, Dave Roberts!
Z. Zaza Pachulia
. The NBA MVP has not yet been announced, but we already know the MVP of
the Western Conference Finals: Zaza!
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