A – Aikman, Troy. The biggest storylines in Super Bowl XLV are revolving around the announcer’s booth. Troy Aikman returns home to Dallas, people around the country will be hitting the mute button to avoid hearing Joe Buck’s rambling, you can wager on what color ties the two will wear and now it looks like Aikman has decided to announce his divorce just days before the biggest game he will ever announce. Aikman revealed this week that he and his wife Rhonda have divorced after 10 years of marriage.

B – Barack Obama. The Commander and Chief and diehard Chicago Bears fan made a stop in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, at the worst possible time this week. Just days after his Bears lost to hated rival Green Bay, Obama was greeted by Green Bay Mayor James J. Schmitt, who was toting a Charles Woodson No. 21 jersey. Obama thanked the mayor for rubbing it in. You may remember the Packers scored 21 points against the Bears in the NFC Championship win and it was Woodson who was upset that Obama said he would only go to the Super Bowl if the Bears went. Before the game Woodson said in a pregame pep talk, “The president don’t want to come watch us win the Super Bowl? Guess what? We’ll go see him.” Green Bay is one win away from securing a Super Bowl and a trip to the White House.

C – Cromartie, Antonio. If any player in the NFL is qualified to speak on the pending labor issues, it’s New York Jets cornerback Antonio Cromartie. After all, he knows a thing or two about courts. Cromartie has fathered nine children with eight different women living in six different states. Just in the last 24 months alone, Cromartie has been named in five paternity suits. The Jets even had to front Cromartie half a million dollars so he could catch up with outstanding child support payments. So being the legal expert that Cromartie is, he began to mouth after the Jets season ended in the bitter cold in Pittsburgh. Cromartie sounded really upset about the collective bargaining negotiations that are threatening to derail the 2011 NFL season. I’m pretty sure nobody listened.

D – Dallas. While Jerry Jones nearly dropped dead at the prospect of the Pittsburgh Steelers vying for a record seventh Super Bowl on his field, at least one Dallas sports owner is happy to see Pittsburgh come to town. Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban, a Pittsburgh native, was ecstatic when the Steelers won the AFC Championship Game. He tweeted after the game, “You’re going to love Dallas Steeler Fans!! Bring me some Primantis and IC Light!” Primantis are the famous Pittsburgh sandwiches topped with French fries, cole slaw and tomatoes and the only thing that sells more than the sandwiches is Iron City and IC Light beer.

E – Edwards and Sanchez. The New York Jets quarterback/wide receiver tandem of Braylon Edwards and Mark Sanchez were so upset after their AFC Championship loss in Pittsburgh they headed to Juliet Supper Club in Chelsea, New York, early Monday morning at 2:30 a.m. The two were seen ripping shots together. Edwards arrived at the club first and Sanchez arrived an hour later and found Edwards. It was one of the few times Sanchez found his receiver all night as Edwards only caught three passes in the loss at Pittsburgh.

F – Fiancé Quits. Looks like Tony Romo’s fiancé, Candice Crawford, has found herself a sugar daddy. Crawford has announced she is quitting her job as a television news reporter to mooch off Romo focus on upcoming wedding plans.

G – Goodell, Roger. Perhaps the only good news that could come out of an NFL lockout is that NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell will take a $9,999,999.00 pay cut. Goodell has promised to cut his salary from $10 million to $1 if there is an NFL work stoppage when the collective bargaining agreement expires in March. If Goodell cannot even prevent a work stoppage, he would be overpaid at $1 a year.

H –Honolulu, Hawaii. Who says players don’t care about the Pro Bowl? On the line this year in Honolulu, Hawaii, on Sunday night Jan. 30 is a whopping $22,500 dollars. That number amounts to the difference between what the winning Pro Bowl team receives ($45,000) and what the losing Pro Bowl team receives ($22,500).

I – Illness. According to most studies that factor in beer, an attractive Super Bowl matchup, liquor, colossal amounts of buffalo wings and buffalo dip and more beer, an estimated 1.5 million people will call in sick on the Monday after the Super Bowl. According to another student about one percent of those people will actually be sick and, no, a hangover does not count as sick.

J – Jay Cutler. The seemingly always aloof Chicago Bears quarterback just keeps compounding his problems. After the bizarre benching from a mysterious MCL injury in the biggest game of his career, Cutler was seen pacing the sideline and even riding an exercise bike. But things got worse for the supposedly severely injured quarterback. After Chicago’s 21-14 loss to Green Bay, Cutler and girlfriend Kristin Cavallari were seen at Mastro’s Steakhouse having dinner. They were eating on the second floor, and get this, Cutler took the stairs, not the elevator. There are many explanations of why Cutler took the stairs, and he was not even on crutches just hours after not being able to compete in the NFC Championship game even those his team desperately needed him. Maybe it wasn’t Cutler, and maybe a look alike who was dating a Kristin Cavallari look alike. Or maybe the elevator was broke or maybe Cutler’s MCL miraculously cured itself or maybe Cutler was never that seriously hurt in the first place

K – Kim and Kris. Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries just started dating in November, but Kim is already thinking about kids. Kardashian and Humphries have been twitter happy lately, posting all kinds of pictures that nobody cares about on each other’s Twitter pages. Kardashian even posted a picture of Humphries as a baby and said she wants her own baby to look just like him.

L – Lies. The bizarre story of No. 1-ranked tennis player Caroline Wozniacki getting into a scuffle with a kangaroo turns out to be a total fabrication. Wozniacki apparently made up the story of fighting the marsupial because many criticized her for being a boring interview.

M – MVP. To hold NFL fans over until the Super Bowl on Feb. 6, the Associated Press will announce its awards for the 2010 season in the week leading up to the game. The first award to be given out will be the Comeback Player of the Year on Jan. 31 with contenders like Michael Vick, Wes Welker and teammates Brian Urlacher and Julius Peppers. The favorites for Coach of the Year include Lovie Smith, Mike Smith, Bill Belichick and Andy Reid. The Offensive and Defensive Rookie of the Year awards appear to be mortal locks with Sam Bradford and Ndamukong Suh the clear front runners, respectively. Tom Brady should be a runaway winner of the NFL MVP award along with Offensive Player of the Year. The most hotly contested award will likely be the Defensive Player of the Year, where Super Bowl contenders Clay Matthews, Troy Polamalu and James Harrison are all contenders.

N – Naval Carrier. Two years after North Carolina and Michigan State took their basketball game to a football field, the two programs have come up with another revolutionary concept. The two teams are negotiating a deal to play a basketball game on a naval aircraft carrier off the coast of San Diego next year on Veterans Day.

O – Ochocinco. The past two seasons have been two of the worst in the NFL career of Chad Ochocinco. So it must be time for another name change. After changing his last name to Ochocinco before the 2008 season, the former Mr. Ochocinco is going back to his birth name, Chad Johnson. No word on if he plans on changing back to a productive receiver like he was before 2008.

P – Parking. Forget Super Bowl game tickets, the biggest price-gouging going on in North Texas this week is with parking. Some parking spots near Cowboys Stadium are fetching upward of $900 on ParkingWhiz.com, which is StubHub for cars.  Not every spot is that expensive, you can find a bargain basement parking spot for the low price of $55 for a spot that is more than one mile away from the stadium.

Q – Quarterback Survey. A survey on ESPN.com asked voters, “Which quarterback would you rather have start in Super XLV?” An amazing 48 states and 61-percent of voters chose Aaron Rodgers while only the states of Pennsylvania and West Virginia had a majority choosing two-time Super Bowl champion Ben Roethlisberger. Rodgers is 3-1 in the playoffs and this is his first Super Bowl appearance. Roethlisberger is 10-2 in the playoffs including 2-0 in the Super Bowl. It is amazing how a few hot playoff starts makes everybody forget about Big Ben.

R- Rich Rodriguez. Just weeks after being fired as head coach at the University of Michigan, Rich Rodriguez has found employment. He will serve as a guest analyst for CBS Sports during coverage of national signing day on Feb. 2. Rodriguez’s latest job will likely feature a pay cut from the $3 million a year he was making at Michigan.

S – Shannon Brown. Looks like there is a benefit to being a no name on the Los Angeles Lakers. Shannon Brown, the Lakers 25-year-old shooting guard, just announced that he and R&B singer Monica were married over two months ago.  Not too many Lakers would be able to keep a wedding secret for this long.

T – Terrible Towel. A few days after the Pittsburgh Steelers AFC Championship win over the New York Jets, the Steelers Terrible Towel was the No. 2 bestseller on Amazon.com in the “Bedding & Bath” category. It was just behind the EatSmart Precision Digital Bathroom Scale. We’re thinking anybody who spends Super Bowl Sunday gorging on chicken cordon bleu meatballs will want to stay away from the scale on Monday.

U – UConn. A major benefactor to the University of Connecticut is also providing a major headache. Robert Burton wants the school to return his $3 million donation because he was upset of the hiring process that led the school to hire Paul Pasqualoni as its football coach. Burton is a CEO of Burton Capital Management, but despite donating the money and having his name attached to the Connecticut football complex, Burton was ignored when it came time to look for a new coach. Hope Burton held on to his receipt.

V – Vick, Michael. It is a long road back for Michael Vick, as evidenced by his first endorsement deal since prison. Before Vick was a convicted felon he was a spokesperson for Nike, EA Sports, Coca-Cola, PowerAde, Kraft, Rawlings, Hasbro and AirTran. Now after prison Vick’s first deal is with Unequal Technologies. The Philadelphia Eagle quarterback recently signed a two-year contract with Unequal Technologies, a provider of the football pads Vick wears.

W – Woods, Tiger. The freefall is not over yet for Tiger Woods. After spending an eternity as the No. 1 player in the world, Woods has fallen down to No. 3 as Martin Kaymer moved up to the second spot after winning a European PGA Tour event this week in Abu Dhabi. Lee Westwood currently occupies the No. 1 spot.

X – XLV. Certain details are only news when it pertains to the Super Bowl such as these nuggets, which are basically the only real news we will hear between now and the kickoff of Super Bowl XLV. It is the NFC’s turn to be the home team this season, so the Green Bay Packers will wear their green jerseys while the Pittsburgh Steelers will wear their road white uniforms for the third consecutive Super Bowl. Green Bay coach Mike McCarthy said he was excited about the green jerseys, although I am sure nobody told him the Steelers were in white in Super Bowl wins over Seattle five years ago and Arizona two years ago. Also, it has been confirmed that the roof at Cowboys Stadium will be closed during the Super Bowl.

Y – You’re Fired. An Illinois car salesman was fired a day after the Bears lost to the Packers in the AFC Championship game because he wore a Green Bay Packers tie to work. John Stone was fired from Webb Chevrolet in Oak Lawn, Illinois when he refused to take the tie off after being asked to do so twice.
Z – Zero Cheerleaders. On the home field of a team that is more famous for its cheerleaders than anything else, Super Bowl XLV will be played without any cheerleaders. The Pittsburgh Steelers and Green Bay Packers are two of only six teams in the NFL without cheerleaders, making this the first ever Super Bowl between teams without cheerleaders. The other teams without cheerleaders are the Giants, Bears, Browns and Lions. The Packers occasionally use local college cheerleaders at home games, but they have been without their own cheerleaders since 1988. Barring a last minute reprieve from Jerry Jones, millions of NFL fans may be left with only Fergie and whoever the GoDaddy.com girls is.